I have just finished reading a most insightful, interesting and eye-opening book in my life. This is not something I admit readily for I have read hundreds of books, possibly into the thousands and this book, despite its non-conventional nature comes out very high on my list of good reads. Of course, it's not as well woven like that of Jeffery Archer nor have the characteristic flow of a Jack Higgins but just the nature and the message of the book makes you feel enlightened.
The book is called "The Game" by Neil Strauss. Most people outside of US probably have not heard of it but the title itself pretty much gives away its content and I believe most people would understand what "The Game" means.
Putting it simply, it's a catch phrase for men (or women) who engages in activities to pursue the opposite (or even the same) sex. In other words, these guys plays the game by using a range of tactics and strategies to ensnare their "prey", screw them and then discard them. Men who plays the game are called "Players" and women are often called "Playettes", however also acknowledged as 'hos (whores), sluts, tramps etc etc.
SO this book details the transformation of a man, an insecure man called Neil Strauss who "penetrates" or rather joins the society of pick-up artists (PUA), learn from the, creates an alternative self called "Style" and using Style to become a Player.
Throughout his journey, he meets various mPUA's (Master Pick-up Artists) such as David DeAngelo, Ross Jefferies and of course, the infamous or rather famous Mystery himself. He learns from each of these artists who have their own method such as "Speed Seduction" or the "Mystery Method". He also goes on various seminars and workshops throughout the world including Perth and teaches various Average Frustrated Chumps (AFC's) how to pick up women and play the game... Finally he creates his own method combined from all these artists and he now calls himself the world's best pickup artist.
The book create 11 chapters with the process of picking up and includes select a target to demonstrate value to blasting last minute resistance. According to Strauss, from the moment he decides to pick up his target and to sex, the duration is anywhere between the same day to the time he calls her. Of course, like any good story, he always succeeds and never fails until the last girl who he marries hahaha! Somewhat unrealistic but definitely a good read!
If you read it, you'll know what I mean by very interesting. It is a best seller on Amazon and so it should be.
Firstly, I want to outline the good points of the book. One, it's a good read and provides a very good background of how to improve self image and becoming a player hahaha! (Spend money, spend time and it would seem that every guy can become a Player lol). Two, the messages are good and as much degrading it is to women, the ultimate message is very good.
Now moving onto the bad points. One, it never details any failures and this somewhat accentuates the true nature of the book, that is, it's designed to excite and convey a message. In reality, despite this guy's successes, I am pretty sure he would have failed and in those failures, killed his own self-morale even more and made him want to try harder to do something that bears little practicality on life. Two, it is highly encouraging to guys to .. well.. become a player. Due to the fact that the book does not detail any failures, it kind of idolise this guy and makes everyone feel that by trying, everyone can become a player and I seriously doubt this. This has a negative side as guy will try and burn and this burning will lead them to more failures and ultimately, possible self-destruction. Of course, persistence is good and trying gives a guy a better chance than none but the way this guy details is really a hilarious way to pick-up women.
Then again, I am failing to neglect the fact that all his pick-ups are restricted to club girls or strip club girls and rarely any outside of these places. According to him, picking up intelligent girls are easier than party-happy girls with attention deficit disorder, yet he seems to pick up girls in clubs with ADD lol!
Finally, this is degrading to women. He sends across a message that ALL women are the same and that they want excitement from their otherwise mundane lives. Pretty much in the earlier parts of the book, he is saying that he can pick up any women no matter what their background as he can provide them with fun and well... excitement lol! This is illustrated by the fact that he managed to pick-up the girlfriend of his best friend in Belgrade, amusing no?
Now, this kind of makes a guy including me very much disillusioned in the female species because by rationality, I feel that in many ways, what he is saying is true and as much as I want to believe otherwise, he has an advantage over other guys.
Of course, he makes up for this near the end by saying that as degrading and degenerating the game is having on his life, the boost in self-confidence is extremely important and I feel this is possibly the most important message he has to convey to all guys.
Girls will always be girls and no matter how hard we try, their thinking process will always be the same and they will always want something a guy like him can provide. So the only thing guys who does not want to become players to do is be self-confident, do his best to be himself and hope to god that a girl can see this and be attracted for what he is, not a game he has created to ultimately screw her. Because confidence allows you to attract others and from reading this book, I realised that we all need to be more confident. I have known that everyone is insecure in their own ways but that to attract someone who can love you for who you are and be with you for the rest of yourself, you need to be confident and be who you are. If they want excitement or something you can't offer, then let them go to guys who can provide this and be happy, or just get screwed and tossed away. Of course, I am not saying to surrender because by being confident and being yourself means doing things that are more exciting and this can be done by being yourself I feel. Confidence is really the game, not just routine, lines, set-openers, closers and sex. While sex is always good, it's not the only thing.
At this stage, I feel like I am trying to convince myself that we guys who does not want to become players or we guys who can't be players (I think I can if I tried hard enough or spent enough money but that's not who I am and not someone who I want to be...). So I'll leave you with the final comments in the book by the "man" himself to think about.
"... And though I learned everything there is about attraction, seduction and courtship in the past two years, I learned nothing about maintaining a healthy relationship. Being together has required alot more time and work than learning to pickup women ever did, but it has brought me far greater satisfaction and joy. Perhaps that's because it is not a game"
Hahaha, so in conclusion, guess what, reading that must be some kind of epiphany for people I reckon. So let's summarise my various random thought and just condense them. I feel the book is good and that learning how to pick-up women is not a bad thing. It improves your chances of dating and being together with someone. However, I feel that it is wise not to trust everything that is being conveyed by the book because well, it is to generate controversy and excitement after-all. So by all means try to become a player, but use the skills for good, that is to obtaining and maintaining a relationship, not to screw women and use them. I am sure the author agrees with me on this and he himself, is a very manipulative person I think haha!
In my closing words, sometimes, being the best, the wise, or in this case, the master of pick-up does not mean they are "the one" because in the end, we are all human and being human means
that we all can be wrong. As the quote goes, "to err is human but to forgive is divine". As cool as it sounds to become a player, these guys often think they are the shit and this is an illusion in itself because it closes them to further learning and only through learning can be become better. So by all means learn but innovate rather than imitate.
Smile, Be Confident, Be yourself and Improve where possible. That is the game. I'd rather be playing this game than something that has little resemblance in life. Spending my time buying weird clothes, being extremely manipulative, rote learning pick-up lines and drinking into oblivion does not sound as well as having fun with friends, buying nice looking clothes and enjoying the experiences of life.
Then again, this is me and I know what I am capable of, so I guess I am luckier than many.
As I continue writing, I realise how I am just a goddamn think machine. I am continuosly outhinking myself and trying to find arguments to outwit myself and as I type this, I look at it with a huge smirk on my face hahaha!
Opps, now I realised something else, nothing remaining static is good for you, and hence it is impossible for me to draw an ultimate conclusion on my view of this book, the game, becoming a player or just becoming a better self.
My conclusion is that Smile, Be Confident, Be yourself and Improve where possible is the game I want to play. So, I hope anyone who reads this blog will seek out this book, read it and come to your own conclusion.
And oh, being a player does not make a guy any cooler than the rest Just means that the girls they're picking up are probably sluttier and easier lol :P
Until next time, enjoy life!