Friday, July 27, 2007

Almost Judgement Day

Well everyone, today is Friday. It is 10:32 PM in Perth, GM +8:00. What am I trying to say? That university is coming to back in roughly in 2 days. This means the follow: assignments, deadlines, group meetings, lack of sleep, cramming, expenditure of money on food. Yes, it is very painful and very, very boring. I wanna die. But ok, enough about my death wishes, let's talk about something good.

Good thing number 1: I had dinner with a most wonderful Korean host (fabulous personality, so cheerful and bubbly). It was superbly delightful. It was Korean BBQ, you know, one of those tables with a grill for coal in it that BBQ the meat. Kinda interesting except the slowness of eating kind of made me more hungry, should have went to a place that had cooked meat lol. The food was like lettuce wrapped with BBQ meat along with soybean sauce and rice. Tasty but not enough as main dish, more like an appetizer...

On an interesting note, I was observing the waitresses. I was so tempted to ask one of them the following question: "Did you have plastic surgery?" haha. I think I would have been abused if I asked that question so I felt it was best left alone. But the beauty of the waitress was very impressive. Hmmm, what if I linked that up? "Are you sure you didn't have plastic surgery because you look absolutely fabulous" ---> Lol, yeah that'll have worked and got a laugh out of her :P

Good thing number 2: Ummm, can't think of any. I can't classify work as good thing. Well, saw Blood Diamond. Fantastic movie, very ahh moving. Leonardo Di Caprio is a good actor.

On a bad side of things: I suck at karaoke. Yeah, I am crap. But I am absolutely surprised at the ability of others to sing them. More amazingly, their memories of the tunes are most impressive.

Finally to conclude my rambling, I would like to mention a self discovery. On the way back home, I thought about a few things and I realised out of nowhere my primary emotional need and that is security. Then again, don't we all? I realised unless I can have security, I will never be satisfied nor happy. Another thing, these days, thinking absolutely tires me. I think I need to start reducing my time spent in thought, it's tiring. Don't you ever just get a period of time where you just want to stop thinking and looking for hidden messages in everything people say or do and just enjoy life? Well, it seems I'm going through that period. Time to think less and act even less, I think it's better for my health and brain :D

What is your primary emotional need? Can one word describe it or you need more?

Time for sleep, more money earning tomorrow *yawn*. Enjoy life ladies and gentlemen and oh, laugh!

Shan.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Shopping Day

Well, how's everyone been. It seems my blog is turning into my daily diary lol but I think everyone maybe find that more interesting than my daily rambles :P

Anyway, today was a rare day off for me and I spent it productively... sort of productively... Had morning tea (dim sum or 早茶) with a friend. Food was not extremely outstanding but the waitresses were bwhahaha!

After that, I decide to go shopping. I had absolutely no money so it was kind of a day wasted (too much drugs for me lol j/k). But as I sat on one of the benches waiting for the bus, I saw this couple. One was a sort of chubby girl and the other, a sort of tall Indonesian dude. As I sat there, I observed one interesting thing. Everytime a pretty girl came by, his eyes would wander and linger on the girl. The girl of course, noticed nothing and continued to display her affections for him.

I sat there laughing to myself... I then began to think... "Buddy, if you are not satisfied with what you have got, then why continue... It's going to end up with disappointment for the girl so why don't you stop before it's too late".

It's better to really start a relationship when both are fully satisfied with each other's physical appearance first isn't it? That way, any break ups that may occur is a result of intrinsic incompatibility rather than these ahhh trivial things... (well, sort of trivial if you consider the bigger picture). Ok, enough about this stuff.

University will be starting again in roughly one week so I think I will begin to blog less. I'll keep everyone informed of any major changes in my life (not that there is or will be in the near future lol unless you consider paintballing and diving exciting changes)... So please excuse my absence in anytime soon.

I'll still be reading all your blogs so keep up the hard work everyone!!

Regards and best wishes!

Shan.

P.S. I read an interesting post today at Monday Morning Power. He is on my recommended list. The article is about the power of positive thinking. Interesting, go have a look!

Friday, July 20, 2007

A Sad Sad Day

Today, I did a very sad but necessary thing. Remember how I said I was going to defuse a bomb very soon? Well, it was more of a try at defusing the bomb to see whether it was imaginary or real.

Putting what I am saying into context, the bomb is a person (female). Well, a bomb isn't a nice word, I was quite tired last night and that was the best metaphor I could think of... Let's say it was a rose with thorns... I am a person trying to handle that rose and reduce it's barbs to an extent where I can admire it for a lifetime. I hope I made the context clear with this analogy...

So today, I decided to truly see whether I had a chance at reducing the barbs. I had a rough idea of what to expect (The barbs is not reducible, at least not for me or by me...)

The result? As I expected (I guess...): Taking good old Julius Caesar's famous words "I came, I saw, I conquered" and changing it to suit my situation: "I came, I saw, I suffered".

As I walked away, I looked at the skies and felt a very deep sadness. A kind of sadness indescribable by words. Yet in another part of me, I confirmed what I have long felt and is kind of glad things are the way they became because no one lied to each other and did not prolong the situation which could have made it even more saddening... Thinking of things rationally, there really wasn't much of a future... Like the rose said once, we are two worlds apart. Haha, funny how fate is isn't it :)

As I walked, I saw a number of beauties yet rather than admiring them like usual (:P), I felt funny... I felt that they were so ordinary, so ... stupid and boring compared to the rose with thorns I knew. I am guessing this is how you feel at the end of a situation like this.

To Rose: So I say goodbye to you, a special place in my heart you'll always remain... There was never of a future and it is better this way. Best of wish to you and I am sure you'll find the one you need to grant you eternal happiness.

Goodbye and good luck!

Thursday, July 19, 2007

A Day At Work

Work at new fast food place sucks. Can't be bothered describing it but just that it's generally crap. I think I'm gonna quit in a bit once I settle down in my new job.

I realised trust is a very important thing today. I realised if someone ibroke your trust once, then they will very likely break that trust again. So for trust, it's best not to give them a second chance. Just a bomb waiting to explode... I'm tired of waiting for the bomb to explode, it's going to be defused very very soon.

Sleepy, meeting tomorrow with clients...

'Til next time, have a good nite sleep everyone!

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Ahh Neglected

Ahhh, it's most unfortunate that I have not been able to post in some time. There has been ahhh... certain stuff on my mind that I had to sort out and hence my blog has taken a second position.

But it feels good to finally get some time to make a post! If you're ever interested, here's a little update:

Firstly, a decision has been made after much thought and that was to change the location of my job. I am currently working in a ahhh food preparation facility (you know what these fancy titles represent I hope haha) in Perth but after much thought and discussion with some friends, I've decided to change to a place 10 minutes from my house. In making this decision, a number of things have been forsaken in order to achieve a primary objective. This objective is of critical importance and despite all the regret felt by one, it was necessary.

Secondly, in the past few days, my expenditure have went through the room. Yes, in 2 days, I spent $500 with one fifth equating to food... Ok, this doesn't sound much but considering I am a penniless student but it's still painful. It's not that I'm stingy, the company with whom the money was spent on was superbly delightful and a number of intangible goals has been achieved at the cost of $100 so I'd say that's a bargain.

Thirdly, I spent last night playing ma jiang from 9pm all the way to 5am in the morning... Right now, I am feeling extremely tired... and need sleep...

So that has been my exciting life so far albeit a few exclusions that shall remain secrets.

On another note, I found out some interesting things about blood types and a persons personality. Supposedly blood type A people can like something for a long time and be quite persistent while B types lose interest in something after a period of time. As for O types, they're generally weird. I found this damned hilarious except it's kind of true... lol...

Unfortunately, there has not been any rationalisation in the times gone and hence no philosophical thoughts. The cause is quite frustrating. Ever been in a position where your heart is in a fight against the mind, gut and instincts? I am kind of in a position like that haha. Right now, the heart has absolutely no ally. On the other hand, the mind, gut and instincts has my friends as their ally and it's absolutely kicking the ass of the heart. So I leave you with something that I have come to term with and that is under all circumstances, ensure reason overcome ones emotions because that way, you are able to see the reality and fall gracefully...

I hope my mind will rest for a bit, so tired and have to interview some people this Friday, shucks... I'll update more often :D

Enjoy life ladies and gentlemen

Sunday, July 8, 2007

A Short Poem

After browsing through a bit of articles, I stumbled across an interesting short poem by Abraham Cowley. As for who he is, I am not extremely well versed but I found the poem quite interesting...

"A mighty pain to love it is,
And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love, but love in vain."

Quite nice...

Until next time...

Saturday, July 7, 2007

A Most Productive Day and Another Random Thought

Greetings!

Today, has been most productive. It seems I have managed to obtain a position as a recruiter for an employment firm in Perth. After lunch with a friend, me and a few other Chinese colleagues met the boss of this firm and had a very interesting chat. A good firm with decent remuneration and a definite good place to obtain work experience and add to my resume. This is a most delightful surprise and has made me extremely happy. I certainly look forward to learning more and of course, gain some experience and money ^_^. My job will very likely involve tapping into the Chinese market and obtain positions for them in their desired industries. Very interesting except the unknowns. But overall, I have absolutely nothing to lose, I'll make more friends and obtain experience, a win win! And of course, making new friends means meeting more girls woot! More fun! Ahem, enough with that....

Anyway, with that out of the way, let's move onto something that has been on my mind for sometime and that is a saying. Translated into English, it is:

"It is most difficult for a hero to pass through the challenge of a beauty".

It means the most difficult thing for a guy aka hero to overcome in many challenges, is the challenge of a beautiful/charming girl. I've been thinking this recently and it is very true isn't it? Men can be trained to overcome ALOT of heavy punishment, yet when it comes to "seduction" or the "beauty challenge", many will crumble. This led me to think just how weak and fragile we men really are. What is one thing that can absolutely bring men down? Women. I recall in the history of China, an emperor was give the choice of his entire empire or one single girl, not an ordinary girl, but one whom he loved most dearly. Guess which he chose? Yeah, the girl. I know, it's kind of stupid, he could have became the emperor and then changed the rules to suit his desires but let's ignore this. The point is that, love and love ONLY is something that can absolutely make or break a man in his life. Everything else is of course still important, but love is the critical factor above everything.

Have a think and get back to me :). Time for bed, so excited! Enjoy life ladies and gentlemen!

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

8 Things About Me

Ahh I've been tagged once more to reveal 8 things about myself, this time from my Canadian friend Zhu. Have a look here: Correr Es Mi Destino. I believe I was also tagged by Amel to reveal 8 things about myself as well. Her blog is here: Amel's Realm.

So I'll make it brief :)

1) I have lived in Beijing for the first 9 years of my life. The last 10 years has been in this place called Perth. The contrast is quite surreal coming to think of it now. The most memorable thing was the first breath of air, it was... quite fresh for a lack of better words.

2) I am really lazy.

3) I am a perfectionist. This is quite contradictory to the above but haha, context and situation rules this. Number 3 overrules number 2 is most scenarios.

4) I dislike noisy things. Between a dinner at friends house and a walk along the ocean, I'd choose the latter.

5) I love my German Shepard.

6) I used to breed turtles until they died. Very unfortunate.

7) I have no favorite things. My taste varies depending on the mood I am in which in turn varies alot.

8) I am a Scorpio.

Ok, the above was pretty lame but hey, it's better than nothing. In turn I tag the following people: Amel (ahahahahah, another one for you :P even though this is probably illegal), Max and
our Greek friend, Deadpolite.

I look forward to reading the details and for some, more haha.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Trust

mmm, today, I came to a interesting understanding about an important thing: trust.

Trust is an important thing isn't it? Over time, one has to give a degree of trust to someone and it is often to the person you feel is worthy and capable of holding that trust. In other words, you can't live without it. It is kind of a crazy paradox. You give your trust expecting whatever you expect in full because you trust that person. But the only thing ensuring that is the moral of that person which you trust even though you have absolute no guarantee.

This brings about another interesting paradox. When you do give your trust, it gets betrayed by the least most expected person often at the most inopportune time. This reminds me of the Murphy's Law which states "whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible time". Very amusing I think. To have it betrayed brings both pain and a moment of enlightenment. Then questions come to mind:

"Why didn't I see this?", "How could I be so blind?", "How could I given my trust to such a person?", "What the hell was I thinking?", "I am such a idiot!".

These questions requires answers but often one can't find answers to them and have to suffice with self answers... They say a mistake is only a mistake when it is forgotten... Reminds me of an interesting Russian proverb that goes something along the following lines: "Dwelling on the past cost you one eye. Forgetting the past costs you both". So the conclusion I came to was that if trust is betrayed once, give no second chance because it'll be more painful the second time round correct? Alas, this is easier said than done isn't it?

But I came to realise a betrayal of a trust is not necessarily a bad thing particularly if it is discovered early. It shows twos things at a moment's thought:

1) The person has low morals or is simply incapable and worthy of keeping your trust. Therefore be on guard at all times. The person may not be necessarily bad, just incapable... No matter what you are trusting the person with, once agreed, there is a silent code of honor that needs to be upheld at all cost no? People today seems to have a very weak grasp of this, it is truly pathetic.... and very sad...

2) I forgot the second thing hahaha. But this cake is certainly good. Strawberry with two layers of chocolate stuffed with two layers of cream and an outer wall of choc. cookies... mmm, delicious. Uhhh, anyway back to what I was saying.

I guess the day we find someone we can really trust as a friend or otherwise is the a truly amazing day. I have yet to find that person and I certainly look forward to that day... if it ever comes. Until that day, it is perhaps still better to trust and betrayed than not to trust because otherwise, you may never find out.

But what I am even more interested is what your take on this thing called trust. Tell me about your experience, perhaps a betrayal and how you felt and dealt with it. And how you decided to move on. I'm sure it'll come in handy for me.

See you next time ladies and gentlemen. Shan.