Tuesday, June 3, 2008

A Little Less Thought, A Little Less Effort..

And ... Maybe Life Would Be A Bit Sweeter.. For You And Me..

It's been a while since I made my last post. Upon reflection, it seems that I have lost alot of my energy to blog. No longer do I find the activity as enjoyful as I first ventured out into this wonderful territory. I am not sure why but I'm guessing it has something to do with the topic of this post.

Blogging used to be a method of expression for me... Something to write down the thoughts that come to me during each day. It's worked well and I think I've made some nice posts that are insightful and open minded. Of course, some not so but I'd like to think the majority was good.

Therefore I intend to continue. But my life's quite hectic and depressing these days... Let me address some of the events that has been occuring:

1) Good thing. I got my license. Something that will give me freedom but it's a double edged sword I think. It also signifies it's time for me to spread my own wings after years of peace under that of my parents.

2) Soon to graduate. As I approach the near end of my university studies, it signifies entering the rat race. The pressure is quite frustrating. On one hand, I need to get out of my current part time job and on the other, I need to find a job that's related to my degree within a decent timeframe. The desire not to fail and show that I can do people proud is overwhelming. Everytime I think about going back to the part time job, I get a dreaded feeling. I realise that I despise that workplace and large majority of the people, especially the colleagues. Therefore, the need to get out is ever mounting. I just can't wait to get the hell out even if it means finding a job not relating to my degree. With something that can contribute to my experience in an office environment, I can always work up just as long as I get out. Job hunting sucks though... So many applications, so many deadlines, so many questions. Be nice to be born rich huh lol...

3) A somewhat unnatural desire to get fit. I've began a gradual exercise regime of jogging and basketball along with usual body toning stuff. No idea why but this is quite unlike before, it just came out of nowhere. This point reinforces point two in that I need to get the fuck out of the fast food joint since working there = dodgy shifts = bad food = hard scheduling and poor diet. Need to get out....

4) A need to organise and understand finances. This point illustrates my subconscious's desire to take out a mortgage... Share broking, business opportunities, networking blah blah blah... I need to move out. Just a natural desire and something that's also weighing on my mind...

5) The need to get in touch with old acquaintances and catchup...

6) Last exams for my first university degree. Also just in time to celebrate my B-Day right after graduating with the degree. That'll be cool. Need to find out about honours, another crushing thought...

So I'll stop there. Typical stuff, everyone who's 20 must be worrying like me. I feel for you all, I truly do and I give out my sincerest hopes for your endeavors in this length of your life journey. For those who are not worrying, I am scared for you. For those who's gone through it and is go a good path, I envy you so wish me luck to get through this stage well. I realise I've gotten very personal, possibly the most personal post I've made in my blogging life. Ah well, that can't be helped, I needed an outlet to vent, an outlet that can't speak back and tell me you have nothing to worry about. Fools.

On a lighter note, for those of you who are still reading my blog, I apologise for not reading and visiting. I hope you understand. I thought I could go into active modes a few times before but I realise now that it will be impossible until everything I am worrying reaches a stable mode. I did create a Facebook account based on pressure from people and I am curious to see how many friends I can recruit lol, it's like a game. Search my email on my profile and add me :P

Also, I have taken sometime out and looked at a few Blogger templates. I want a minimalistic design and I found a few good ones. Again, when I get some time, I will give my blog a revamped look. I intend to add in some nice sections including Books, Movies and Music. Perhaps you'll find something I like that is to your interest as well :)

Until next time, here's a nice song from the famous Marie Digby: Say It Again and oh, don't think too much like me so SMILE!!!!! ^_^



8 comments:

Raymond Chan said...

It's not easy, but I'm sure somehow, you'll get through it. There's so many people who've struggled through their part-time jobs and uni and landed themselves in a proper job and got their own houses and all that, it's not impossible.

Just focus on what's in your hand now and take one thing at a time, but of course, don't forget about the hurdles coming your way =)

btw, I used to work in fast food too. Almost 2 years, but I couldn't stand the management and the work environment.

Shan said...

Good points Raymond. I'm ashamed to say that I'm part of the management and I hate the damned environment too lol...

They don't take care of anyone.. There's no leadership, all dodgy as managers who's selfish as.. Pfft.

Zhu said...

Yes, we all worry the same!

But you seem to take positive steps, studying, exercising, voicing your thoughts and ideas... this is good.

Take one thing at the time and you'll be just fine.

Amel's Realm said...

GOOD LUCK in your endeavours, Shan! You'll find your way. You're a smart and ambitious guy! ;-D

So just do your best, be your best self and that'll be enough. If that's not enough, what else is? HE HE HE...

Keep the faith in yourself. You'll find a suitable workplace for yourself later on! :-))) You just need to be patient and see which opportunity is the best for you. ;-D

Again GOOD LUUUUUUUUUUCKKKK! I'm crossing my fingers for you, but I know you'll be a successful person! ;-D

Jeff said...

I remember when I was at your stage in life. I was worried about everything, too. If I could take the present me and visit my past me, I would give this advice:

"Jeff, don't worry about the future. It will come with or without your worry. God's plan, or destiny (whatever you want to call it), is going to come in its own time in its own way. You will get where you need to be with or without your concern, so just try to enjoy the ride."

Shan, if that does anything for you, great. If not, it is all a part of the process. I have confidence that you will do just fine.

Shan said...

Zhu: Hehe, thanks, I was too stressed, thought, let's make a post and get some of the stuff out of the system

Amel: Thank you for your kind words. I'll make sure I do the best I can. If I get a good job, I'll have to make sure one of my holiday trips involves going to Finland :D

Jeff: mmm, I had a deep reflection regarding what you said. It's very interesting. Worry, perhaps what you say will become of me in the future but for now, it seems I can't stop worrying. Indeed, it's part of the process of growing up and I sincerely appreciate your vote of confidence. You have no idea how much a few simple words can do. Thanks again.

Amel's Realm said...

Hey, that's be GREAT if you can visit me one day!!! ;-D

I agree with Jeff, though...never in a million years would I have thought that I'd end up in Finland he he...;-D

Shan said...

Amel: hehe, who knows what life holds for me..